Evolving Relationships
Greetings readers! It’s been a long time, is it? I had nothing that made me feel deeply enough to write a blog about it. So, here is one on evolving relationships.
I won’t go on and on about how we have people who care or people who don’t. I am here to vent out this time. Some people find this very heavy to discuss, and if you fall into that category, I can’t guarantee that it won’t make you anxious, but I can promise you that we are all on the same page.
Sometimes we meet people out of the blue. We connect, we vibe and we carry that forward. We name that aura, that feeling, as something and set boundaries. It’s oftentimes friendship, romantic relationships, or even familial ties. They come in as strangers at one point in our life and then play a huge role in shaping our personalities for the better or the worse. You never know when the transitions happen, right? “This is so and so, they’re a classmate of mine” suddenly becomes “This is so and so, my best friend”. Hold up, hold up! Transitions are both ways. “This is so and so, my best friend” can become “Oh them? I don’t talk with them anymore” real quick, and we don’t even realise it until this hits us hard externally.
Small arguments, big fights, miscommunications, misunderstandings, not listening enough, not saying enough, listening too much, saying too much, looking or not looking a certain way, behaving or not behaving a certain way, thinking or not thinking a certain way, liking or disliking certain things (or people), everything big and small creates so much of friction in any relationship. My question, although very simple, seems highly triggering to me included — Why? Just a simple “why”.
Why do some people expect things out of you? Why do some people see the flaws only? Why do some people scar you? Why do some people just become dementors (oh that’s a Harry Potter reference if you didn’t know) in your life? Why do some people impact you negatively?
At the same time…
Why do some people not expect anything in return? Why do some people choose to not only see, understand and overlook your flaws but also choose to stay? Why do some people become the bandaid to all your scars? Why do some people become the “Expecto Patronum” (and that’s the spell used to wade off dementors by the way) of your life? Why do people impact you positively?
I do not have any of these answers and you are welcome to comment on them for us to learn and grow.
People use the words “promise”, “forever” and “time heals” very leniently. Little do they understand that these are not mere words. Honestly speaking, time does not heal, time just changes perspectives for you to see and understand new things so you move on. Forever is also a joke. Somewhere, everyone who promised “forever” is going to break that promise — be it losing touch or death.
I had the privilege of talking to my cousin who said, and I quote, “one positive thing about life and moving ahead is that there will be new people with whom you are bound to make new weird memories and gain great experiences, but the negative side is there always will be people.” I did laugh when he said that, but once you rethink, the entire thought process changes. Disconnecting from relationships in any form seems highly impossible. Society thrives on interdependency.
In my humble opinion, the reason for a change in relationships is not changing priorities or losing interest. Instead, it is the lack of communication and the misunderstandings that follow. There are many more, I agree, but this comes on the top of my list.
Anyway, as the old saying goes, “change is the only constant”. Let life unfold.
Until next time, it’s Shreya signing off.
